Liar Liar

I lied to you. Yes, that’s right I lied to you. I told you that I thought you were good, deeply good and that you were a wonderful person. You’re not. You’re cruel and you’re stupid. How many times can I let you back in? How many fucking times until I get it?  I have to say that I hope this is the time that makes it clear.

I supported you through anything and everything. I supported you through your mood swings, your substance abuse, your dis-ability to keep your dick in your pants. And above all, I loved you and trusted you. You threw that away. And for what? A subpar life, and remaining ignorant to your fucked-up-ness.

You need help. Help I’d never be able to give you. You’re unstable, and you fucking realize what you had and lost, yet are unable to fix yourself. You’re unable to do shit in order to make this relationship work. You’re unable to treat me like a fucking human being. You took me round and round on your emotional roller coaster. And I fucking loved every minute of it.

What the fuck is love though? I have no idea. I clearly didn’t love you, because by saying that I was under the impression that you actually fucking loved me back. OH WAIT. You do, supposedly, but what’s that to you? Nothing.

I’ve decided that someone needs to create a word meaning the ability to love and hate someone at the same fucking time. Because I love you, God I love you, but I hate who you’ve become. Do you even know who you are? Probably not. I’m sure that I know you better than you know your own self. Fuck that. Grow up, figure your shit out and do something.

It’s like you died, but you chose to. You chose to give up, and do what was easy.

You’re a piece of shit human being who uses people to get you through things. You used me to get over a shitty girl you forced yourself to date for three fucking years. You used my vagina. And you used me when you were feeling sad, because you knew I was the only who would understand.

Good luck finding the connection we had. Good luck finding a love like ours. Good luck living your life normally ever again. I hope you think of me every fucking day, and I hope you crave me. And I hope you eventually shed a tear.

You asked for closure? So here you go. You’ve given me plenty, too many times.

So goodbye asshole. And I sure as hell hope you’re happy, you chose this life.

Enjoy,

J